Less writing and more living: exactly what I needed

It’s been almost a month since I’ve written a post. Well, truth be told, written anything. 

I was on a roll; writing posts, writing poetry. Capturing life! But the words got stuck -— stuck in my mind, stuck in my throat, stuck in my heart. And when words don’t come out, a writer like me feels bereft, longing for my voice and longing to express myself. Messily, eloquently — I didn’t care as long as I could capture what I was thinking and feeling and put it out into the world.

I tried. I really did. I tried writing anything to jog the words and get them to tumble. But they remained stuck. Frustrated beyond belief, I took the only course of action that I believed to have left. I carefully stopped writing and I continued living. I continued to go on adventures. I continued to seek out opportunities and possibilities. I kept saying “yes,” never really wanting to say “no.” The only difference was I didn’t share. I went out into the world and just did.

In hindsight, maybe it was better this way. Maybe, just maybe, as the shedding of the previous lunar year began in earnest, it was time for reflection and recollection. Maybe I needed to experience what I was releasing and prepare for what I’m about to experience.

Perhaps I needed to pause and remember grounding and gratitude. Thankful for the lessons of the past, humble to bring the learning into the next phase but also eager to leave behind who and what no longer serves me. And maybe all of this needed to happen with me being fully present in who and where I am. Fully present and not recording. Maybe I needed to be where my feet are; mind, body and soul without an eye softly focused on how and what I was going to write and share.

Maybe, just maybe, I needed to simply be. And so I did. I gave in. I gave myself up. And with joy, abandonment in self, I shed. I gathered. I discarded and I grew.

And here I am, words flowing. Ready to capture some of those experiences on paper with a slightly different perspective than I might’ve had. 

I invite you to join me.