Proud if kindness is my legacy

“You are one of the kindest people I’ve ever met."

The words washed over me and made me uncomfortable. I don’t consciously set out to be kind. I don’t think, “This would be a kind thing to do,” and then do an action or respond in a manner. And I’m not sure I’m worthy when someone points out something I’ve done in the name of love.

I baked a birthday cake for a friend. For me, a small, simple gesture to celebrate another spin around the sun for a friend. But it moved my friend to share how he feels about me and my actions.

In a world where people can be unkind, I’m glad that I am kind.

I’m not sure that, if called upon, I could give you specific examples of things I’ve said or done that are kind. I do my best to speak positive words into the world. I do my best encourage, support and show love in my written and spoken messages. If unkind words are spoken between myself and another, I’ll offer an apology and attempt to reset and clarify. 

Is this kindness? Perhaps. But kindness born from being older and having different experiences where kindness wasn’t prevalent. Those moments create choices — move forward with kindness or move forward acting in the same vein that was shown to you.

I do my best to be generous with my time. I want to be a person you know you can count on at any time, in any way. If I’m buying a gift for someone, I do my best to pick out something I think they will enjoy, something that I hope will make them smile.

I believe, though, that kindness is learned and, after it is, it is a choice. I was shown kindness growing up and that kindness stayed with me. Growing up in a farming community, I’ve seen my parents help strangers, neighbours, family, friends. I’ve seen what happens when kindness is effortless and given freely. When faced with a choice to be kind or unkind, I’ve chosen both but almost always regretted choosing unkindness. 

So, I guess, it surprises me when someone points out something that I don’t think twice about doing or saying. And while it makes me uncomfortable, I will say this: if people think I’m kind, it’s a pretty great legacy to leave.