Precious gifts remind me of the reciprocal nature of kindness

I’m a firm believer that what you put out into the universe is what comes back to you. Good. Bad. Ugly. How you treat others — family, friends, strangers — finds its way back to you.

I do my best to treat everyone I encounter with kindness and respect. Countless years of customer service roles has taught me that everyone has a story and, whether they chose to share it or not, it’s often the reason for how they interact with others the way they do. 

This applies to people I know and people I’m not familiar with. Everyone has a story.

I also do my best to perform  random acts of kindness to others; small things that will hopefully make their day. Small, simple things — words of gratitude and encouragement, small gifts that either lend a helping hand or, with my loved ones, evoke a memory that encourages a smile. I never know when one word, one kind act, will be the difference in someone’s day. 

I expect nothing in return; in fact, I have a hard time accepting gifts and words of praise. I get uncomfortable and deflect, feeling a bit unworthy. It’s something I’m working through — being gracious at receiving. I think this is because I was raised with the adage that it’s better to give than receive. Receiving is hard. 

This past week, friends gave me three unexpected gifts that humbled me and filled me with love. Thoughtful gifts that made me smile and brought tears to my eyes because people took the time to send me love. 

The first gift was from an amazing couple I travelled with on my Moroccan tour. I feel like I instantly connected with these incredible women from the moment I met them. Warmth and kindness radiated from each of them. I’m usually a pretty good judge of character and this was no exception. Travelling together for 15 days created bonds that I’m positive will hold for a lifetime. We laughed together, learned together and shared love. 

There were many moments on our trip that inspired smiles and giggles, many moments that I can recall with just one word. 

Two words stood out.

Yalla which means “hurry up” or “let’s go!” Yalla was something that our tour driver would say to hopefully get our butts in motion. Yalla was something became part of my trip vocabulary quickly and, to be honest, is still something I utter and mutter, especially when dealing with tardy drivers. I don’t yell "yalla! yalla!" so they can hear me but it does make me feel better. 

The other word I use regularly is habibi. Habibi means “my love” and it was something said to me early in our trip by one of the Moroccan men who greeted me at an arts school where I had a mosaic table fountain made. When I discovered what habibi means, I began to incorporate it into my vocabulary as well. The amazing couple knew of my love for both these words and the fact that they make me smile —and that’s why they sent me a reusable shopping bag with both words printed on it! I laughed and cried as Moroccan memories washed over me the minute I opened it. The thoughtfulness, the kindness, the love. It’s humbling. I love the fact I can use this bag for so many reasons and it will always make me smile from the memories of both Morocco and, more importantly, the beautiful couple who have become treasured friends.

The second gift is special in a different way. Awhile back, I had seen a crocheted Wednesday doll and fell in love with her. Since crocheting is not in my wheelhouse, I reached out on social media and asked if anyone would consider making her for me. I would pay all materials and labour costs. A friend said she absolutely would and began the project. I was in absolutely no rush but, in the end, my friend advised me it took her longer to finish than she would’ve liked and she gifted me the doll. Her time, her details, her absolute skill — beyond words. I had trouble accepting such a gift and struggled to just say thank you. In the end, we struck a deal: I would pay it forward in a way that would hold special meaning for her. I do have a few ideas that I’m researching and the pay it forward idea is the way she is — kind, generous in nature, thinking of others. 

The last gift that came my way was words. One of my heart sisters and I were chatting about ourselves — how we view ourselves and how others view us. One of the things she said to me blew me away (because I don’t see myself this way): She said I’m adventurous. Whether it’s solo travel, trying out a new class by myself, or just spending time in my own company, I’m  not scared to make my own way in the world. I’m comfortable in my own skin. I never thought anything of it, though; if I want to do something, I just do it. 

She took it one step further though and said that by living my life like this, I’m “cool.” I’ve been called many things in my life but “cool” has never been one of them! 

I listened to her words, absorbed them, felt them and then swallowed and thanked her. What she said to me — being the total opposite of how I see myself — made me feel confident, made me feel proud of who I am, and how I live. I’m so blessed to have someone who loves me tell me the truth about me.

I believe that all of these gifts were meant to find their way to me to remind me of a few things. Be gracious in receiving so the giver knows their gift is appreciated. Be humble, kind and grateful when receiving gifts because the thought and care put into them is priceless. Finally, keep doing what I’m doing, spreading the love, the positive energy, the good vibes. If it makes a difference in my life, it will make a difference in someone else’s.