IT'S ALL COMING TOGETHER

You know those times in your life where it all comes together? Where you feel strong and powerful, confident and liberated? When you walk into a room and simply own it?

That’s me. This is me; right here, right now. I don’t know why. I don’t care why. Everything has changed but nothing has changed. 

I walk taller … well, I mean tall for 5-foot-4. My head is held higher, shoulders back, glutes squeezed, which automatically straightens my posture and makes my butt look great! I’m looking everyone in the eye and my smile dazzles. The people I encounter daily tell me that. I’m losing weight, toning up and I feel proud of myself physically. 

What’s manifesting physically, though, is because of how I’m feeling inside. I feel free. I feel like something that was blocking my energy and spirit has shaken loose and left me peace and joy. I feel everything and anything is possible. Doable. All doors are open. My time is now. My place in the world is secure. I require no validation from anyone as to my worth. I know my worth. I am worthy. I am valuable.

It’s not that I didn’t think or feel this way before. I did. But there was generally one or two things that I questioned and so all of these feelings of strength and power were softer and smaller. But not now. 

So what does feeling like this actually mean? How does it translate in my everyday life?

When I reflect back on my Christmas season, it was easy and filled with love. It was my third Christmas without My Favourite Husband (MFH) and it was the best. My New Year's celebration was quiet, soft, solo. It was exactly how I wanted it to be: watching hockey, a movie and going to bed. 

The first few days of the new year has had me applying for a volunteer position with a homeless mission, planning my next trip and considering future job prospects. I’m meeting with friends, and spending time plotting and planning activities that are interesting. Markets, a concert of Spanish music in a historical church, a dinner and theatre production. Because I’m putting out positive, I’m getting it back in return. 

I’ve also done something I said I’d never do and signed up to try online dating. I’m doing this with a girlfriend so we can share the experience and connections together. I’m naive with the process but willing to give it a try. Why not? Saying yes to new things is the only way to see what I want in life.

Before Christmas, I stopped at a market and had my tarot cards read and an energy reading. I don’t do this often; years can go by between readings. But something compelled me to stop at this market and, once inside, something compelled me to connect with this reader. It was a different reading because she didn’t tell me that “this” would happen or “that” would happen. She read a few things about my future but the reading was more spiritual in a sense. My biggest takeaway was that I was on the precipice of beautiful things happening in my life, of my life being impactful to others. She didn’t say I’d be famous but that I’d find the purpose I’ve been looking for and make a difference. She told me to enjoy the journey as much as the destination I’m heading towards. I pressed her for more details and she said she could see where I’m headed but was reluctant to predict the future because the future can be changed through free will and different choices. 

Some people choose not to believe in readings. Some do. What I’m choosing to believe is right now her vision of me making a difference in the world around me, being impactful and finding purpose is manifesting in what I’m thinking and feeling right now. I feel like it’s all coming together in the most beautiful way possible.

I’m beyond grateful for this life and this time in my life.

Much love ❤️